I wish someone would tell me they love me...

Sometimes we wish we could hear someone tell us they love us, how special we are, how we are valuable. But when no one around does, we need to remind ourselves of this.

Never compare yourself to others nor things that are in the world, because the God of the universe, who is greater and higher than all that is in the world loves you and knows your value, that He sent Jesus to die for you so you wouldn't have to die, nor go to hell. He sees how precious your life is, because you belong to him. Reading the Bible is God's love letter to you.

When you read the Bible, read about the stories of how he saved the lost sheep and rejoiced over finding it! (Luke 15:6). How he has given you his fullness and grace. (John 1:16). How his love has been poured out in your heart by he Holy Spirit who has been given to you. (Romans 5:5). How he has given you eternal life. (1 John 5:11). He has given you all things that pertain to life and godliness. (2 Peter 1:3). He destroyed the works of the devil for you. (1 John 3:8).

If we read God's love letter to us, WE REMEMBER we are loved, forgiven, cared for, saved from going to hell, given us everything we need for this life, and how when we go astray... he looks for us and runs to us with open arms (like the father ran to his lost son, Luke 15:20), and welcomes us back to himself!

At times, we need to REMIND OURSELVES and encourage ourselves of how God loves us and how valuable we are to Him.

READ THE BIBLE, it's God's love letter to you!

Do you deal with guilt?

I have to mention this that in our NYC Bible study we were discussing Gal. 3:13 how Christ redeemed us from the curse of the law.

As Christians we are not called to live by the law anymore. We are called to live by the leading of God's spirit and the Law of Love. Jesus said a NEW COMMANDMENT I give you. (To summarize it ) it is to love God and love your neighbor as yourself.

If we live by the law of love, we wouldn't want to sin or do something wrong to others. Love works no ill to his neighbor - Romans 13:10

Gentiles lived in Galatia. Some Jews at that time were trying to put the laws of the old testament upon the gentiles. Paul writes the people of Galatia and says in Gal. 3:2 "Let me ask you this one question: Did you receive the Holy Spirit by obeying the law of Moses? Of course not! You received the Spirit because you believed the message you heard about Christ."

We can never win God over by doing something good. He loved you before you did anything good at all. You and I received the favor of God alone by believing on Him, not by doing good or obeying the law.

Paul says in Gal. 3:5 "I ask you again, does God give you the Holy Spirit and work miracles among you because you obey the law?" (or did good deeds we could say)... NO, none of us received God's goodness because we were good, but because He loved us before we were good.

In our NYC Bible study, one person said in James 2:18 it states; "Now someone may argue, 'Some people have faith; other have good deeds." But I say, How can you show me your faith if you don't have good deeds? I will show you my FAITH by my good deeds.

Good deeds come from the desire of faith in our hearts, not from an outward obligation. Many of us deal with guilt because our thinking is incorrect. Guilt and feeling obligated comes from the outward, but faith and love with good deeds come from our inward man.

Ask God to forgive you of your past failures and move forward. God doesn't keep a record of your wrong doings... Now you can do good deeds from the inward desire of your heart with the faith that is in your heart. That is how God wants us to live.

Live a live of love, be led by the Holy Spirit, walk in love, walk in faith and live from your heart with good deeds. That is how God wants you to live.

 

 

A New Year's Goal for the Single Christian...

 

 It’s the beginning of the new year and some of us have resolutions, some don’t.  Some of us have certain goals we want to accomplish, and some don’t.   Some of us are determined to meet the person of our dreams this year because we are tired of waiting. 

 Some of us are determined to look for that special person of our dreams this year and find them.  We are convinced it will happen THIS YEAR! God teaches us in his word to ‘take no thought for tomorrow”.  In Matthew 6:33 Jesus says: “But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you.  Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things.  Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.”   So what is Jesus saying here?  He is saying, follow me and everything you want will be given you.  Jesus is also saying, Don’t worry about the future and how you will get what you want, take care of what you need to take care of today.  If you don’t take care of what is right in-front of you how can you take care of what you want for tomorrow?  Jesus is saying, be responsible for today, be responsible for right now. Don’t worry about tomorrow and how you will find your mate.  Remember that the decisions you make today, will affect you tomorrow.

 It is important to live for God today and let God do the work finding you the right person.  Does that mean you shouldn’t make yourself available by going to different Christian events, singles events or family and friend’s events?  No. You should make yourself available, but Jesus point is to trust him and let him bring that person to you.  Don’t do it your own way.  

 We forget that God knows what is going on in our lives.  Reading God’s word helps us remind ourselves of what God knows, but waiting so long and being lonely becomes bigger in our mind than our remembrance of God’s word.  “Faith is the confidence that what we hope for, will actually happen.”  (Heb. 11:1) Faith and feelings are two opposites. Feelings are the voice of our flesh, and faith is the voice of our spirit.  If we go by what we feel, it will lead us away from Gods promises.  Faith stands on God’s promises.  Faith says; “I believe God, no matter what I see or feel.  God’s got this and he will bring me the right person in his timing.”  If we try to do things our own way, we might slow down God’s plan or end up marrying the wrong person for our lives.

 So instead of being determined that you will find your spouse this year, determine to live life God’s way. Let God bring that person to you.  Don’t try so hard in finding the person of your dreams.  Remember that God is a good God and that living for him is what we are called to do as Christians, not get what we want to have a happy life.  We are called to follow Jesus and his plan for our lives, and when doing that we will get what we want.  So, determine that you will put God first and take care of the things you need to take care of today and let tomorrow take care of itself when the time comes. 

 Remember Matt. 6:8; “Your Father knows exactly what you need even before you ask him!”

Trust God, he has good things in store for you this new year.  Let him bring them to you.

A Man's Prayer to God Concerning Christian Women...

A man prays to God and says: "Lord, I am a good man but why do Christian women not look at me or speak to me?"

 Here we have a Christian man who is looking for a nice Christian woman in church.  He looks around and sees a woman he might be interested in and decides to walk by her to see if she will say hello to him.  He walks over and begins to talk to a friend who is near the woman.  She doesn’t turn to say hello and she walks away with her friends and goes out to lunch with them after the church service.

 What this man was hoping for, is for this woman to acknowledge him and say hello.  The woman didn’t.  So this man walks away thinking she has no interest in him and won’t even give the time to look at him or talk to him.  Is this really the case?  No, not necessarily. 

 If a Christian woman is in church and sees a man she might be interested in, down deep she is hoping he will come and speak to her.  The woman feels that the man should initiate the conversation.  According to the Bible the woman feels the man should be the initiator.  She gets this thinking from Proverbs 18:22, (He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the Lord).  So according to this verse the woman feels the man needs to find her.  As a matter of fact, many women are wondering where he is right now!

 If you are a man and you are hoping to meet a nice woman in church or at a Christian gathering, the woman is waiting for the guy to initiate a conversation.  She thinks in her mind that the guy should ask her out on a date and that she shouldn’t have to ask the guy.  Women are looking for the man to be a man and take the initiative.  She wants the man to treat her with respect and to treat her like a lady, and you should.  If you do that she will appreciate it and be thankful. 

 If a man is waiting for a woman to talk to him, he might be waiting for a long time.  If you are reading this and you are a man, take the initiative to strike up a conversation with a woman you might be interested in at church or at another Christian gathering.  Make it a casual conversation.  Go to Christian social gatherings where other people will be around and you will have a chance to talk to her where the environment is comfortable socially for her.  A woman needs to feel comfortable with you before she will go out with you.  Go with her in group settings for coffee or the diner with friends so she can get to know you a little bit.  Once a woman is comfortable around you, you can strike up a longer conversation.  Becoming friends first is the best way to start a relationship.

 Hopefully for the man, this will give you some insight on how (most) Christian women think.  If you strike up a conversation with a woman and she doesn’t seem interested, don’t be discouraged.  She might not be interested and God has someone else for you, or she needs to get to know you and doesn’t want to be rushed.  The woman could be going through something and doesn’t feel like talking to any man at that time. Don’t take it personally like something is wrong with you because it seems a woman is not interested.  There is nothing wrong with you, it’s a journey to find the woman God has for you. Take things one day at a time.

 Pray to God before you talk to women, ask God to help you when it comes to finding the right woman for your life.  God’s way is the best way.  Trust that God will bring the right person to you, but it might not be the first person you meet… So don’t get discouraged.  Know that God is working in your life and that you have to do your part to find the right woman for you.  Remember… “He that finds…..” Proverbs 18:22

 

God why did you answer her prayer for a husband and not mine?

Why Does God answer other people’s prayers and not ours it seems?

The question is ‘how do we get our prayers answered’?  Jesus said in Mark 11:24;

 Therefore, I say unto you, “For this reason I am telling you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe (trust and be confident) that it is granted to you, and you will [get it].”  Also the Apostle Paul said in the book of Philippians 4:6; “Be careful for nothing; but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.”

 

We are to pray, believe that God heard our prayer and believe that the answer to our prayer is granted to us.  The waiting part is hard sometimes, but we cannot compare ourselves to others when it comes to answered prayerThere are some things we can do to get our prayers answered and some things to take in consideration.  Here they are…

 

1.    Doing the Father’s will

I can of myself do nothing: as I hear, I judge: and my judgment is righteous; because I seek not mine own will, but the will of him that sent me. – John 5:30

We are called to follow Jesus as Christians.  It isn’t always easy doing the will of the Father.  Jesus experienced that in the Garden of Gethsemane.  Before he was taken to be crucified on the cross he said,” And he said, Abba, Father, all things are possible unto thee; take away this cup from me: nevertheless, not what I will, but what thou wilt. (KJV).   As we live our lives being in the will of God and doing what the word of God says helps for our prayers to be answered. Doing your will and not the Father’s will is a hindrance to getting your prayers answered. Things like unforgiveness, not walking in love can hinder your prayers. We need to make sure we are following what the Bible says to do for our lives.

 

2.    Talk to God about how you feel

Do not fret or have any anxiety about anything, but in every circumstance and in everything, by prayer and petition (definite requests), with thanksgiving, continue to make your wants known to God, and God's peace [shall be yours, that tranquil state of a soul assured of its salvation through Christ] which transcends all understanding shall garrison and mount guard over your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Phil. 4:6

Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you. – Ephesians 4:6 – 9

It is important that you talk to God about how you feel.  This is important to getting through those lonely times.  These scriptures show us what to do.  We are to tell God how we feel in prayer and then think on things that are of a good report.  God doesn’t want us to think on sad things, but on good things.  This is important in keeping your faith for what you are believing God for. Always remember that God is for you, not against you.  (Romans 8:28, 31 & 32)

 

3.    We are all in this together & God’s timing

 

1 Corinthians 12:26

And if one member suffers, all the members suffer with it; or if one member is honored, all the members rejoice with it.

When you are hurting, all of us in the body of Christ hurts.  When some other woman gets a husband, she is blessed and that means the whole body of Christ is blessed.  That means if God hasn’t forgotten her, God will not forget you because God is no respecter of persons, he treats everyone the same.

 But now hath God set the members every one of them in the body, as it hath pleased him. – 1 Corinthians 12:18

When another woman gets a husband, it is God’s timing for her to get a husband.  We can’t determine the timing God has for us and others.  We live for the Lord and trust that his timing is best. Is it easy? Sometimes it is not easy, but this is why we need friends and Christian fellowship to help us get by the tough seasons of loneliness.  This is what this singles ministry is here for to help you get through tough times.

 

4.    Follow the leading of the Lord 

The spirit of man is the candle of the Lord searching all the inward parts of the belly. - Proverbs 20:27. This means God will enlighten you through your spirit.  God will speak to you through your spirit man.  We are a three part being.  We are a spirit, we have a soul (mind, emotions & will) and we live in a body.  Since God is a spirit and he lives in our spirit, that is where he will speak to us. 

When you meet a Christian man the Lord will let you know on the inside of your spirit whether he is the one for you or not.  Follow the Lord.  Do not rely on your own judgement.  You will be glad you did. Give it time, don’t rush when you first meet a Christian man.  Give it some time to test the fruit of his life and you will be able to see more clearly. 

 

             5.    Once you meet a Christian man…

Once you meet a Christian man, observe him and how he lives his life by how he treats other people.  Give it some time, you at first will meet his ‘representative’ and then the ‘first impression guard’ goes down and you will begin to see the real person later on.  Ask good friends what they think of him. Sometimes we can’t see everything about a person right away because our emotions are beginning to get involved in our relationship with this guy and our emotions can blind us.  So remember to observe him for a while before you decide he might be good for you and pray to God about it and follow your spirit (heart) where God will lead you. Use wisdom and take things one day at a time.  God hasn’t forgotten you, and if you have a desire for a husband, God will give you one in his timing.  God’s timing is the best timing and you will be glad you did it God’s way!

 

If you need more encouragement in this area you can contact us and Pastor Mary will be happy to speak with you and pray with you concerning this matter or for any situation.  God bless you.

 

 

What to Expect for the Holidays

Martha Washington stated this:  "I am determined to be cheerful and happy in whatever situation I may find myself.  For I have learned that the greater part of our misery or unhappiness is determined not by our circumstance but by our disposition."

When the holidays come, we have certain expectations of what we think the holiday should be like.  On occasion we get disappointed on holidays because they don't turn out like we would like them to be.  The holiday time can be stressful, buying gifts, buying food to get Christmas or Thanksgiving dinner ready, Christmas parties to attend, church services to attend.  Everyone wants everything and being a mom the kids seem to want everything from you.  

It also comes around this time of year that single people feel lonely, wishing they had a significant person in their life during the holidays. We have this image in our mind that things should be like we have seen them on the TV.  A happy domestic family with a nice meal at Christmas, nice gifts, and everyone gets along and is happy.  That is not real life for some families.

The media has put pictures in our mind of how "things should be" or how we would "like them to be".  Yes, we do want relatives who get along with each other and are loving, but this is not always the case.  

So what should we expect?  No family is the same and don't expect your family to be like the family on the TV or someone else's family.

Take one day at a time.  

Don't spend more money than you can afford on gifts.

Plan the days you are going to shop and get it done a little at a time.

When the relatives come over, make a decision to be a blessing to them.  Even if they don't expect you to be a blessing, be one.  

Say kind words about people.  Show kind actions.  If we don't decide to do the right thing for ourselves and others, and stay in our hurts, we will stay hurt and so will others.  Make a decision to bring healing to your family members.  Don't think about what you don't have, think about what you do have.

Be proactive instead of reactive.  

Promote a happy atmosphere when people come in to your house or when you go to another's house.

Love Never Fails - 1 Cor. 13:8

Walk in love the best you can and pray God will grace you to live a life of love.

For those who are single and struggle with loneliness... As I stated before, don't look at what you don't have, look at what you do have and enjoy the people who ARE around you and don't be sad that your "significant other" isn't there yet.  Love those around you, be the difference in their lives. Bring healing to people who need it.  (Another single person wants someone who is happy and loving, not someone who is sad and depressed).

God knows you would like someone in your life that you can spend the rest of your life with.  God hasn't forgotten you. We think of how we don't have someone, when God tell us to love our neighbor.  These coming holidays, make a decision to love your neighbor instead of looking at what you don't have.

God loves you all and knows what you are dealing with,but as Martha Washington said, she determined to be happy in all of her circumstances because she realized that her unhappiness came from her disposition, not her circumstances.

Determine that your holidays will be happy, make your holiday a happy one by being a blessing to others, love your neighbor as yourself and remember that love never fails

 M.Hajj

Who holds me at night when I cry at night?

Someone approached me with this question... 

"Yes, God has answered many of my trials on earth but who holds me at night when I cry?"  So I did my best to answer it, here it is...

Jesus cried at night also
Many singles looking for a spouse cry at night hoping someone will come along soon that can have a relationship with. In case you didn’t know Jesus wept at night also.  Jesus has gone through every temptation like you have.  In Hebrews chapter 2 we see that it says: “We also know that the Son did not come to help angels; he came to help the descendants of Abraham. Therefore, it was necessary for him to be made in every respect like us, his brothers and sisters, so that he could be our merciful and faithful High Priest before God. Then he could offer a sacrifice that would take away the sins of the people. Since he himself has gone through suffering and testing, he is able to help us when we are being tested.

Jesus understands

We see that the bible reveals that Jesus went through every test we have gone through.  Jesus longed for a spouse.  How do we know this?  The bible says that he was tempted or as the Greek word tempted (Peira) in Hebrews 2 means; “to have a trial of a thing, to experience, learn to know by experience.” Jesus experienced every type of trial we all have experienced, even wanting a spouse and crying at night for one.  Who held Jesus at night when he cried? Jesus went through the same thing you go through when you cry.  Jesus wanted a spouse because he was a human being like we are and had the same feelings as you do.

Jesus prayed

 Jesus went to our father in prayer during trials.  We know this because in the Garden of Gethsemane Jesus had prayer time with the father before the worst trial he ever went through, death on the cross. Mark 1:35 states; “Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed.”  Jesus made his relationship with his father close.  He communicated with God on a daily basis.  Like 5:16 says; “But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.”  God wants you to pray and be refreshed in his presence and to look to him instead of a person for strength and comfort.  The Lord loves you and wants you to make HIM your FIRST LOVE.  Though we feel lonely, we have to keep moving forward in following God and put him first instead of our feelings.  If you put God first, your thinking will change and your feelings will change.

Spiritual growth during brokenness

God is calling us to grow in him and trust that even in the midst of your brokenness that he is calling you to look to him to rely on his love and peace.  1 Peter 5:6-7 says; “Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time: Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.”  It is important to humble ourselves to God’s will and timing for our lives.  We might not understand why we have to wait so long for a spouse, but ultimately, The Lord is the potter and we are the clay.  He created you and he knows how you feel on the inside and what you want.  We need to learn to trust that his timing is perfect and that his love for us is great. Receive his peace.  Colossians 3:15 says “And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to the which also ye are called in one body; and be ye thankful.”  We need to allow the peace of God rule in our hearts.  When you feel sad and lonely, that is the time you need to reach out to the Lord in prayer and receive his peace and allow it to rule in your heart.  Yes, there are times we are sad and cry, but once that is over, God wants us to get up and keep living for him and do his will.  The Amplified Version of this scripture states this: “And let the peace (soul harmony which comes) from Christ rule (act as umpire continually) in your hearts [deciding and settling with finality all questions that arise in your minds, in that peaceful state] to which as [members of Christ’s] one body you were also called [to live]. And be thankful (appreciative), [giving praise to God always].”  Here the peace of God should help us settle with all finality all questions that arise in our minds and that is the way we are to live.

Follow after peace

Following after peace is a guide to help you determine God’s will for your life.  If you are anxious about something, it is probably not God’s will.  If you don’t have peace about a situation, walk away from it, it’s not God’s will.  Peace is the “umpire” that God has given you as a tool to know his will.  Peace is not just “feeling good” about something.  Following after peace is learning how to follow God’s spirit.  God lives in your heart and that is the #1 way he will lead you is through your heart (not your head).  If you are confused in your mind, it is not the Lord.  Pray and get God’s peace for your life and he will help you overcome when you cry at night.

 

 

 

How Can I Fulfill The Call Of God On My Life Without A Spouse?

Some single people feel they cannot fulfill their God given calling without a spouse.  Are single people not able to fulfill their call without a spouse? Some singles might feel that way, but this is not the case.

1.     Jesus is our Ultimate Example

Jesus was single and he fulfilled his call without a spouse. You might say, “Well, that was Jesus.  He was supposed to fulfill his call as a single person.” Well my questions to you is this; Are you fulfilling your call right now until your spouse comes?  Are you preparing yourself for your call so that God can send you a spouse? 

2.     Prepare yourself ahead of time

You are called to answer the call of God on your life as a single person until your spouse comes.  If you are waiting for a spouse to fulfill your call, you will be waiting a long time.  Begin to fulfill your call so you are spiritually, physically and socially prepared to join up with your spouse and you are ready to do ministry with him/her.

Acts 2:42 - And they devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers.

3.     Devote yourself to God and his plan first

Singles and married people are to be devoted to learning the word of God, fellowship with other Christians, and pray for each other.  Our focus as singles is to be devoted to God first, no matter what we feel.  We all know the scripture, Matt 6:33 - But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.  If you do and believe this scripture you will find a spouseGetting yourself in the will of God and following his plan is what will get you to the place that God can give you a spouse.  We think about what we want, what about God?  What does God want?  He wants you to love him more than anything, more than you want a spouse.  Are we at that place yet?  The Lord wants you to give yourself entirely to him.  God created us, he is Adonai, our master and Lord.  We need to follow our loving Father and his path for our lives.

One last note… The Lord knows how you feel and wants you to understand that we are to answer the call of God for ourselves before we have a spouse and after we have a spouse.  Your spouse can’t fulfil your every need. No one can give you true peace in your heart like the Lord can.  The Lord has to be your first love.  God created you so you can be conformed to the image of his son Jesus.  (Romans 8:29) He is the potter and we are the clay.  He knows you, he created you.  He knows who is right for you to get married to.  Remember we are the clay, not the potter.  We are the work of His hands.  Isaiah 64:8 says “Yet you, Lord, are our Father. We are the clay; you are the potter; we are all the work of your hand”.  

God Cares For You

Who is God? God, the Father, Son and Holy Spirit cares deeply for you. See what the Bible says about who God is...

Psalm 86:15 states this: "But thou, O Lord, art a God full of compassion, and gracious, long-suffering, and plenteous in mercy and truth." (KJV)

Psalm 116:15 says; "The Lord cares deeply when his loved ones die." (NLT)

The Lord cares deeply all of the time. Here it is revealed in the word that He cares deeply when one of our loved one dies. This verse reveals that He feels what you feel. Remember the Holy Spirit lives inside of you and feels what you feel. He is not clueless about your life.

The apostle Peter writes in his epistle; "Casting all your care upon him; for he cares for you." 1 Peter 5:7

Once again, the word of God reveals that the Lord cares for you and wants you to talk to Him about what is bothering you. It's important for you to take the time to tell God what is going on in your life, just like you would tell a friend.

God cares so deeply that he sent himself through Jesus to pay the ugly price for our sin to set you and I free from it. Because Jesus died for us, he made everything NEW! Reality is that Jesus made you new on the inside and we can let it shine on the outside!

2 Cor. 5:17 says: "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away, and look, new things have come."

Don't live in your past... Look ahead to the new things and new life God has for you! Your past doesn't determine your future. Your past is gone and if you look ahead to God's plan, your life will be filled with new blessings you never could imagine. Life is a journey. In time, God will reveal all of the good things He has for you.

Ephesians 3:20 says; "Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us." (KJV)

God has good things for your life! Keep the faith and know that God cares deeply for you!

 

 

 

 

Dating Advice

If you are dating someone that's isn't saved, don't be surprised if he or she doesn't understand the things of God. If you keep trying to win them over and it's not working, here is the reason why...

“The person without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God but considers them foolishness, and cannot understand them because they are discerned only through the Spirit.”
1 Corinthians 2:14 NIV

You might think.. "It's hard to find someone to date!" So you will date someone even if they are not saved and don't know God. Your eyes are focused on the wrong thing.

Get your focus on preparing yourself for the person God brings to you. Make sure you are strong in Christ Jesus. If you want to have a good relationship with some one, you want them to be a strong Christian and you need to be a strong Christian. So get your focus on learning who you are in Christ and become what you need to be to have that good relationship with that special someone. That way God sees you are ready for Him to bring that person to you.

Keys to Finding a Potential Spouse

There are many singles in their 30's, 40's, 50's +. Many are looking to find a spouse and... some are not.

The question for many singles is, "What is the key to finding a potential spouse?"

1. Don't try so hard. 
If you try too hard the other person will see how 'desperate' you are. At least you will appear desperate to the other person. No one wants to be with someone who is 'desperate'.

2. Be yourself. 
Don't talk about your entire life's story on your few dates. Enjoy the company of the other person. Relax and appreciate the time you are spending with that person.

3. Get to know the other person.
Date someone for 6 months to a year to get to know him/her. Remember, when you first date someone, everything is 'proper and nice', - you are dating their representative. After 6 months to a year the person will begin to let his/her guard down and you will begin to see their faults. We all have faults, but you need to see if you can handle or deal with his/her faults. There will never be a perfect person that you will get married to.

4. What are his/her priorities? 
Are your priorities and his/hers the same? You have should the same morals and values as the person you are looking to spend time with.

5. Are you able to communicate well with the person you are dating? 
If you can't communicate with the person you are dating, or they have no time to hear you out when you need to talk about something, this is a red flag that he/she wouldn't be a good match for you. It is important to find someone who is willing to listen to you and communicate back words of encouragement.

St. Paul said this about relationships to the people of Galatia.
“For you have been called to live in freedom, my brothers and sisters. But don’t use your freedom to satisfy your sinful nature. Instead, use your freedom to serve one another in love. For the whole law can be summed up in this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” But if you are always biting and devouring one another, watch out! Beware of destroying one another.”
Here St. Paul makes the point that in a good relationship, people consider each other. Being in a relationship is not what the other person can offer you, but what you can offer the other person because you love them. John F. Kennedy said: "My fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country."

That is what relationships are basically about. Though we feel lonely and want someone to fill that loneliness for us, we also need to remember, a good relationship gives to make it good, not takes from it to make it good.

I hope this helps some of our single friends out there. Even if you already know all of this information, I hope it is a helpful reminder for you.